Surgeon

We must be Surgeons in our own lives, to ruthlessly cut out those things that don’t matter. 

Our time is not boundless, it is not limitless. Each of us has only 24 hours in each day, and our days our numbered. 

Paul speaks earnestly of this when he says in Ephesians 5, “Look carefully how you walk, not as unwise but as wise, redeeming the time, because the days are evil. Therefore, do not be foolish, but understand what the will of the Lord is.”

You cannot redeem the time, and be a good steward of the hours the Lord has given you if you are not careful to plan. Plan your time, rightly prioritize your assignments, resist the urge to passively exist, do not let life happen TO you. Eliminate, surgically and carefully, those things that do not matter. 

This will look different for everyone, and will change with the seasons of life. 

In a lighter tone, this brings to mind something I heard a man say once, “People ask me how I have the time to do it all, dad, business owner, fitness, sleep, home, training - I said I don’t, I just choose which area that week I will neglect. Last week it was cleaning the house, this week its sleep.”

The above quote speaks to the seasons of priorities, but I think the use of the word “neglect” is wrong. Nothing should be neglected, though it might lower on the priority scale. 

Many men, taking ‘wisdom’ from culture, will seek to be ultra successful at work and think they are excellently compartmentalizing their time to be as productive as possible. We may call this the workaholic. This usually leads to sacrificing your family on the alter of success. The issue is not that this man is addicted to work, but that he is a sluggard at home. This man may be working hard at the culture facing areas of his life, at work, to avoid the harder work that needs to be done at home. 

Know who you are, and know whose you are. Correctly align your priorities to your assignments - God gives you those by the way. 

God has entrusted me with my wife, and my children. These are my first assignments. He has entrusted me to be a member at a local church, where I am called to serve. He has given me family, and made me a friend to a few. I am called to serve them, and especially those who do not yet profess Christ. He has given me the assignment of each person that I come into contact with on calls for service in East Kansas City. 

This is by no means an exhaustive list - Just a brainstorm as I sit thinking about my God given assignments. Now the task is to make my time reflect those assignments, hobbies may have to get the boot. 

The real virtue is not hard work. You can work hard and neglect the things that matter most. The real virtue is disciplined work. 

1613 Men's Conference Notes

 I recently attended one of the two days that my church joined in via live-stream to the "1613 Men's Conference"

The conference was predicated on 1 Corinthians 16:13, which reads: 

"Be watchful, stand firm in the faith, act like men, be strong."

I believe the speakers' aim was to address that line, "Act like men". What does it mean? The underlying premise of the conference was that there is a scriptural standard which defines the answer to that question, and it lies in stark contrast to how the world would seek to answer it. 

Good so far. 

Before I continue let me say this - I was not asked to speak at this conference, so any criticism that I may have is coming from a man who was not in the arena. 

"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood;"

I take nothing away from the men who spent their time to prepare and to present their thoughts. I am but a critic in this context. 

That being said, here are my thoughts.

The audience was urged to listen to men due to their extensive resumes. Resumes that consisted of incredible successes on the battlefield, or in the sports stadium, or the courtroom. In one instance the audience was being urged to not pursue manhood based on the world's standard of success, and in the next were told a man was credible due to his worldly successes. 

I did not hear one man introduced with qualifiers such as, "He has six grown children who all remained in the faith".

The heavy majority of speakers were war veterans. Automatically claiming the respect of men in the audience because what is more manly than going to war? What could be more selfless? 

Does the type of selflessness that we like to talk about only consist of prioritizing national security over personal safety? What about the type that would prioritize family over personal accolades? Is the greatest sense of duty depicted by dying on a battlefield, and not by homeschooling our kids in order to raise them in the training and admonition of the Lord. I am not meaning to take anything away from men who have sacrificed, but I what I would like to draw attention to is that the military is filled with men who can make decisions under fire, and who are unable to discipline a child. When you make sacrifices on the battlefield, men respect you, medals are earned, beers are purchased. When you make sacrifices at home, you simply lay your head to rest on your pillow at night and do it again the next day. Usually there is no thanks, there is no spotlight. So which really is the sacrifice? I grew weary during my time in the Marine Corps of men all too willing to accept the common "thank you for your service" and all too willing to serve only their personal desires when it came to their family, or their duty as husband or father. To an audience full of fathers and husbands, the conference consisted, in my opinion, of too many war stories, and too few home stories. 

We love to train firearms. We love to shoot, I love to shoot. We know that when tragedy visits us we do not rise to the occasion but simply fall back to our level of training. And so we train. But how many times in your life will you need to draw concealed in the grocery store and shoot an active threat? How many times in your life will a man enter your home at night seeking harm to your family? Switching gears, how many times will your children look to you for wisdom? So as we prioritize our time, what type of training will be put to the test more frequently? Make no mistake, both are of life or death consequence. 

Nick Freitas made a comment I couldn't help but write in my notes. "Men say, 'I'd die for my family', yeah, probably instantly". He rightly makes a jab at those men who are quick to claim they would act heroically in a single instant, but then fail to act heroically in the opportunities that are presented to him each and every day. Decisions to train, decisions to wake early, decisions to ask forgiveness, decisions to sacrifice time doing something he would like to do in order to do something he knows he ought to do. This person thinks a lifetime of selfish decisions will prepare him to make an incredibly unselfish decision in a moment of crisis. Not so. 

Joel Salatin: Food predicated on an anti-death philosophy is anti-Christian. To the Vegans and Vegetarians, all that they are doing is seeking to eliminate death as a prerequisite to life. To the chemical fertilizer industry, they seek to claim that you can have life without sacrifice, that something does not have to die for something else to live. I am always encouraged by this man's consistency.

I appreciated the time I had to listen to other Men's perspectives, hear their stories, and think critically about their claims. I think the conference as a whole missed the mark in that their aim was to point men to scripture for their definition of manhood, but urged you to listen to the speakers based on their worldy accolades. For an audience likely hungry for practical application, they were given war stories. War stories are great, they can be applied to our spiritual war surely, but the application has to be drawn and has to be clearly prescribed, otherwise you may just enlighten that flame inside every man that is so drawn to the foreign battlefield which yeilds glory and drawn away from that battlefield in their own homes. In simple terms, its sexy to fight your way to a downed blackhawk, its boring to lead family worship. Unless of course you rightly state that the two are not all that different and that one is in fact much harder and much more important than the other - that is the piece that I found missing during the conference. A disconnect. 

Verse 14: Let all that you do be done in love. 

A Daily Battle Cry

 Last night as Meghan and I finished putting the kids to bed, we sat down on the couch, eating our dinner past 10PM and sighed. We both felt it. Fellowship in our home had been broken that day. We both failed as parents, having self control in our responses and discipline of the children. Our home had not been full of Love, Joy, or Peace that day. 

As I sat down this morning to read, I revisited a book called "Family Worship" by Joel Beeke. He quotes J.C. Ryle and I will share it here: 

"I charge you, fathers, take every pain to train your children in the way they should go. I charge you not merely for the sake of your children's souls; I charge you for the sake of your own future comfort and peace. Truly your own happiness in great measure depends on it. Children have caused the saddest tears that man has ever had to shed. Such sorrows are heavy enough when fathers have faithfully discharged their duty yet still live with a prodigal son or daughter. But who can bear the reproach of a stinging conscience that condemns us because we never brought them up in the fear of the Lord? What shame to have failed to take seriously the vow we uttered at our children's baptism to raise our children in our confessional doctrines. How much better if we can say: "Son, we taught you God's word; we wrestled for your soul; we lived a God-fearing example before you. You didn't see in us a sinless piety but an unfeigned faith. you know we sought first the kingdom of God and his righteousness. Your conscience will bear witness that Christ is the center of this home. We sang together, prayed together, and talked together. If you turn away from this light and these privileges, and insist on going your own way, we can only pray that all our bible study, praying, and singing will not rise up against you in the Judgement day - and that you will come to your senses before it is too late. "

I had highlighted this entire portion because it struck me so deeply. And this morning it served as a solemn reminder of my duty as a Father to lead my family. When the household is groaning under the weight of Sin, it is the father's duty to establish the heading, to set the fix, find the azimuth of faith, and LEAD. 

"For God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of Power and of Love and of a Sound Mind." 2 Tim 1:7

Blansett's, what spirit lives in us?

The Spirit of the Holy God!

What is the fruit of that Spirit?

Love, Joy, Peace, Patience, Kindness, Goodness, Faithfulness, Gentleness, Self Control - If we live in the spirit let us walk in the spirit!

And if we tire?

Let us not grow weary of doing good, whatever a man sows, that he will reap. 

Today we go to battle, and we stand firm wearing the whole armor of God:

We gird our waist with truth

we put on, the breastplate of righteousness

we shod our feet with, the Gospel of Peace

we hold in our left hand, the shield of faith - with which we quench the fiery darts of the enemy

on our head, the helmet of salvation

in our right hand, the sword of the spirit, which is the word of God. 

Who is our King, and in whom's army do we march?

Christ is King!

The will of of God in Christ Jesus for us is: 

We rejoice always, pray without ceasing, and in everything give thanks. 

Hold fast to Good, Abstain from every form of Evil. 

What Makes Men Passive?

 I am working through a book with men from church, “The Titus Ten” by Josh Smith. 

In discussion this morning the question was posed, “What causes Christian men to be passive?”

This question gave me pause and I think is worth breaking down an attempt at an answer. 

Simple answer, Sin. 

Many understand the first Sin in scripture to be Eve’s disobedience by eating the forbidden fruit; however, the text says that that she ‘also gave to her husband, who was with her, and he ate.’ Gen 3:6. 

Adam was with his wife, who he was given by God, while she was tempted by a serpent. He watched while the snake twisted the words of the creator, and watched as his wife did the one thing God had forbid her to do, and yet he did not enter the arena. Passivity. This is truly the first Sin that I see in scripture - Adam’s failure to act. That was HIS wife that he was instructed to tend and keep. 

In Officer training with the Marines a phrase was hammered into my psyche - ‘Indecision is a decision.’ That phrase haunted my brain as I slept at night. It was a warning. If you don’t make a decision, you are deciding to lose your men to the enemy. Death will visit your platoon if you fail to decide and act. The phrase stays with me today. Every time I watch one of my children do something that requires discipline I hear it in the back of my mind, ‘indecision is a decision’ - will I decide to discipline? If I passively let the situation melt away without doing so, am I inviting death to visit my child? That may seem extreme but we know that when Sin is allowed to fester in our soul, death is indeed what awaits. 

So what caused Adam to be passive? What tempts me to be passive today? What lives inside of every man on earth that whispers, ‘it’s not a big deal, it’ll be okay’?

Fear? Do we fear making the wrong decision so much, do we fear the rejection or the thoughts of others so dearly, do we love so much to be liked, that we fail to act? The devil does not create, he distorts. Fear is actually a requirement and it is a good thing.. when it is rightly placed. Fear of anything but God is misplaced fear.

“Do not fear those who kill the body but cannot kill the soul. But rather fear Him who is able to destroy both soul and body in hell.” Matt 10:28

When you fear something you are recognizing its power over you - rightly align your fear. There is only one who holds this power and is worthy of your fear. 

Weariness may be another reason. We may be so tired of trying and failing that we become passive. A man in our book group shared an example of trying to lead someone who did not want to be lead and he grew so tired that he stopped leading. 

-As Christian men, we do not have the liberty to get tired- Matt Truax

Spurgeon - “By Perseverance the snail reached the Ark.”

Paul urges the church in Galatia, “do not grow weary while doing good”. 6:10

Passivity can be self preservation. We may think that to survive comfortably we must remove ourselves from situations. Well firstly, where did we get the notion that comfort was something to be desired? But I will draw in a concept from warfare. Self preservation is at times necessary - but it is a means and not the end. MCDP 1 dives into this with the notion that we defend out of weakness - in order to build strength, momentum, planning, in order to once again take the offensive. Sure the defense is the strongest form of warfare - you risk the least, but you gain no ground. You defend so that you can attack. Which means there is an objective you are after, and it is not just keeping the high ground. 

Christian men are not called to simple maintain the ground, we are called to advance. 

My takeaway from our discussion this morning is this. That in order to act, in order to make sound decisions, in order to root out passivity, we must be so rooted in scripture and in the Gospel that it is an automatic part of our analytical process. It must be the filter through which every decision must pass, and yes even that harrowing decision that is indecision. 

Your Name - Archer

 In the process of naming my Children, I have struggled with yours, my fourth child, and my second son, the most. 

That my be evidenced by the fact that I am writing this post approximately 24 hours AFTER your arrival into this world, as apposed to several months prior.  

As Meghan and I discussed names, I continued coming back to the words of King Solomon in Psalms 127 vs. 3-5:

"Behold, children are a heritage from the Lord, The fruit of the womb is a reward.

Like arrows in the hand of a warrior, so are the children of one’s youth.

Happy is the man who has his quiver full of them; They shall not be ashamed,

But shall speak with their enemies in the gate."

Remember that Solomon's father held up the severed head of a Giant as his battle cry rang out, spurring on the army of the Lord as they pursued the Philistines. His father, when learning of this Giant's challenge, confidently recalled the times in which he hunted lions and bears in order to protect his sheep, and defiantly stated that the opposing warrior would end up no different than those predator's limp carcasses. That was only the beginning of Solomon's Father's story. Imagine the conversations Solomon had with his dad, imagine the upbringing that shaped him. He then grew to become the richest man in the world, and yet returned to the above truth. Here is a man who understood the bloody realities of combat. He understood the wide array of distractions that accompany great wealth and fame. He then states not that kingdoms and riches are a reward, but that children are. He states not that large armies and stockpiles of weapons are like the tool that the archer uses to pierce his enemies through, but that children are. 

Your Brother's name is centered around cultivation. Growing that which the Lord has blessed him with. 

Your name is focused on defending it. 

Men are required to do both. Men are required to weild both the sword and the trowel. To rebuild the walls of the city and fight off the hordes who threaten it. 

To have something worth fighting for, and then to fight for it. To build something worth defending, and then defend it. 

To fight and to defend without a cause is to lust after violence. To coward under threat of assault to that cause is to have never loved it in the first place. 

Archer this is my charge to you. This is my prayer for your life. That you would cling to the words of Solomon, and desire to be blessed with that great heritage from the Lord: Children. Secondly that you would have the capacity and the will to be a warrior. Defend what the Lord has blessed you with. Sharpen the arrows he gives you, that when you lose the bowstring they would pierce deep. 

Thirdly that you would not hold it against your mother when you are thirty years old and she still calls you "Archie". You will always be her son, and she will always have fond memories of holding the 9lb 5oz baby that you once were. 

Your middle name, Joel, is in honor of a man who has had a great impact on your Mother and I: Joel Salatin. In fact his worldview greatly impacted our decisions on life after the military. He first fired our passion for working the land, and open our eyes to God's beautiful design for the food that sustains us. He is unapologetically consistent, questioning why christians can be so blind to the hypocrisy of pursuing spiritual health, and disregarding physical health. I have often claimed that men cannot compartmentalize their lives, as much as they try. If one is a tyrant at home, a lazy provider who regularly takes shortcuts in leading his family, this will bleed into his life at work - sooner or later. Joel makes the argument regularly that as Christians continue to choose the quick fix, cheap and easy solution to food, they will sooner or later, chose the cheap easy solution to other things in life as well. It may be a stretch here but if a man is defaulting to the drive through and forgoing the planning, diligence, and effort that it takes to prepare a real meal at home, or help his wife as she does, how long will it be before he takes the same approach to his love life. Will he eventually also take the drive through approach to sexual satisfaction (I think we all see the metaphor). Joel is after consistency. Archer, may you be assiduous like Joel, may you be consistent in your approach to all things in life, weighing your decisions on the scales of scripture and not convenience. 

Last of all you are Blansett. You are a member of this team and you are greatly loved. Three other little sets of hands at this very moment are arguing about who gets to hold you first and longest. Welcome to the tribe. I will close in keeping with my closing to your older brother. Much love awaits you Archer, and much responsibility awaits you as well. Good thing that's something you're made for. Your Mother and I love you dearly Archer Joel Blansett. 

Book Request on Leadership (Military)

 I had a former Marine of mine reach out this week requesting some reading material on leadership in the military. 

One could find numerous titles under the commandants reading list, and I won't claim to have read them all or even close to it. 

I do believe that in any story in history in which you will find a respected leader you will find similar tenants. 

Self-sacrifice. Wisdom. Consistency. 

Sacrifice: The men, and the mission must come before the interests of the self. 

Wisdom: A level of personal investment into the study of the task at hand must have been completed. This is an element of sacrifice, becoming an expert in a craft does not happen in a night. 

Consistency: They are who they say they are. They do what they say they will do. As simple as this sounds it is an uncommon virtue. 

The titles that immediately came to mind:

The Bible!

Matterhorn

The last stand of Fox Company

MCDP 1 and 1-3

Armed Forces Officer 1950 edition

Killer Angels

Gates of Fire - This one has been very impactful to me. The USMC and all branches across our warfighting force pay lip-service to the term "Professional Warrior". This retelling of the Peloponnesian War gives a glimpse into a generation of Men that would make ours look like elementary school girls in camouflage. 

I have often wanted to write a series called "The Apogee Letters" a play on "The Screwtape Letters" and an addition to "The Attritionist Letters" which was written in the Marine Corps Gazette to make the argument that as much as we claim to be maneuverist in our theory, we are really attritionists in our actions. I would be making the claim that as much as we claim to be a warfighting institution with lethality our primary goal, we are really a shadow of a lethal past - capitulating to a weak society, forfeiting the very treasure we set out to protect. 

I have said the phrase "when I have time" too often - the longer I continue to say that the more details of my personal experience in the Corps I will begin to forget. 

I shall begin!

Exit Stage Left

 It has been almost two full months now since my official time as an Active Duty marine came to an end. The transition overall proved more difficult in many ways than I or Meghan expected. I think over the coming months I will have more to say over this topic but I wanted to pause and take the time to reflect.

1) Identity Crisis - Very easy to feel this, even when you didn't think you got your identity from the military, you did. In ways that weren't evident, and that's okay, even good in some ways and at some times. We do identify with what we spend our time on, what we spend our effort on, and in many cases, you spend more time at work than you do at home or at church, therefore it follows that your vocation would shape a large part of your identity. Pause. Lets be very clear that as Christians our identity is in Christ. That supersedes all else. Within that, God has given us responsibilities: Husband, Father, Leader at church - and these all nest within our identities in Christ - because we are Christians we operate a certain way within these roles. A biblical way. Now if you believe in the providence of God, then your vocation is certainly not outside of that providence and therefore is also a responsibility of yours to nest that role within your greater call to identify with Christ. I am a Christian husband, I am a Christian Father, I am a Christian Marine. It so happens that over the last 5 years of my life, that last nested identity determined where I lived, when I was able to be at home, when I was able to travel with my family, the healthcare we received, my time, Etc. 

Two months ago was my last day as an Active Duty Marine. 

I faced the crux of competing priorities and I made a difficult decision - but one that placed my role and responsibility as a Husband and a Father above my vocation. 

The transition was not all sunshine and rainbows with a smooth plan for housing, a high-paying job, and a friend group all waiting for us. In fact, we faced several obstacles: Our deployment was extended by three months, leaving us just over one month to sell our home, pack and move our belongings, and transition my platoon to oncoming leadership.  The job I thought I would get immediately out of the Marine Corps decided I wasn't the right fit. The church we thought we would be attending deemed too long of a trip for us to have a regular community. The loss of our church family, friend group, and purpose at work weighed heavily on Meghan and me, a real dislocation of expectation, and we often questioned if we had made a mistake. Did we too fall into the grass is greener mentality? 

Now let's place all of those doubts and obstacles against the reality of today. 

For the past three months I have been at the dinner table every night with my family. 

My children have had their father read to them, sing with them, pray with them every night before they close their eyes. ( barring a week I visited my parents in Africa) 

I spent our 6th wedding anniversary with my wife, after spending the last three apart. 

I am building my wife her dream home on 21 acres, most importantly with her dream oven from France (that last part was joke). 

We are living with my in-laws during the build process and our kids are creating a deep relationship with their grandparents. 

I could go on about all the blessings, the list does not have an end. 

The Marine Corps is efficient at warfighting because when I left, it didn't matter. Someone stepped into my role and is now doing an even better job than I did. 

Quick list of some things I'm taking away - 

- Being in the Marines is a privilege, not a right, you might have to give up part of yourself to succeed(If you know my story you'll know how literally I mean that). Reinforcement of the fact that things worth achieving require sacrifice. 

- Greatest achievements were not my own but those of my Marines. Promoting my chief scout to SSgt is one of the greatest honors I received. Re-enlisting a sniper in the mud after a ghillie break in, securing four more years of his leadership within the community, two more promotions after break-ins. The awards, the school graduations, the Honor graduates of those schools, the intelligence briefings I sat in the back silently clapping as my Cpl absolutely crushed a threat analysis. All of those things I just listed were accomplishments of those around me, not my own, but they are what I am and will remain most proud of. Greatest achievements as an Officer were not my own but those of my Marines. 

I love this because its the same for Husband's and Fathers. If you want to know the worth of man, look at his wife. Look at his children. Don't look at him, look at what he's responsible for cultivating and determine if they are thriving. This is a constant reminder to me when I start thinking too much about myself.  

- Sometimes training had an alterior motive. We thought we weren't getting any more trained by being so miserable, but that was the point. Being comfortable with being miserable DOES make you a better, more capable, more lethal, leader. Don't shy away from difficulty, embrace it and the change it will make in you. 

- We weren't training Marines, we were growing men. "If you're planning for years grow rice, if you're planning for centuries grow men"